What the fuck are you looking at? You're the one who told me to get comfy, and these pants are tight as fuck. What, you didn't know I had a dick? (Sulcate)
There was a new guy at the office. We took him out clubbing. I told my girlfriend to meet us there. I pretended to be the new guy's wingman and helped him pick up my girl. She took him back to our home and now he is posting this on the work group chat
