You can pretend she's looking into -one- of your eyes at least... maybe an eye and the opposite ear? Hey remember the 80's!? pretend she's mesmerized by your dangling silver feather earring!
[f] βI like big butts and I can not lie You other brothers canβt deny That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist And a round thing in your face You get sprung.β -Sir Mix-a-Lot